Breathing space

A regular practice of mine is a so-called 'Mental health day'. When the combination of work, study, chronic health problems and whatever else gets all too much, I schedule a down-day. A day where I do as little as I feel like. I can veg and watch DVDs, lie on the bed and read a book, potter around the garden. I have two rules: I must not specifically set out to achieve anything

AND I am not allowed to feel guilty about taking the time out. A day like this and I'm good to go again.

Lately, I'm not been even getting the option to think about that. However, the 'mini-mental-health' fixes are endless. How about a 10 minute chat, coffee in hand, with friends and family over Skype, a quick read of my favourite blogs, a quick browse of You-Tube for a favourite comedy sketch for starters?

My absolute favourite though is a quick trip to my favourite city, Vienna, courtesy of Merisi at Merisi's Vienna for Beginners. Stunning new photos of Vienna every day, accompanied by beautiful text. Sometimes landscapes, sometimes city shots, sometimes people, sometimes coffee and scrumptious cake (calorie free when enjoyed vicariously). Always a brief respite for the mind. If you haven't discovered it already, I urge you to check it out.

What's your mini-mental-break?

Time Out!

Picture from http://www.freewebs.com/behaviourmanagement/timeoutinroom.htm

Seems that almost everyone I'm seeing currently has some kind of anger issue. Practical Man thinks that's kind of ironic seeing he thinks I can be a little grumpy myself on occasion. Really?

Although we're socialised to believe anger is wrong, anger is actually a natural, healthy emotion. Anger is a signal that something is our environment is not right. Blocking it can result in both physical and psychological health problems. Anger exists on a scale from mild irritation to outright fury. What is important about anger is the level and how we express it. When expressed appropriately, we defuse stress and frustration and others can understand that we're upset. When expressed inappropriately, with blame or aggression, we fail to get our message across. People switch off or become defensive and situations often snowball.

One of the techniques people have been mentioning to me that they've been using to manage their anger is timeout.

It's true that timeout can be an effective tool when used properly. However, for many people this translates to leaving the situation in a distressed state, often getting into a car and driving or going for a drink. Not so good. We're less likely to be in control of our behaviour when we're riled up. Let's face it, an angry driver is never a safe driver.

So, do you use timeout when you're at boiling point?

DO

Take the time to explain to the people you're with what you are doing and why. Avoid inflammatory statements such as 'You're driving me crazy'.

Leave the situation for approximately an hour.

During your timeout, try to do some exercise, followed by a relaxing activity to calm yourself.

Take time to objectively identify your thoughts and feelings.

DON'T

Stay away more than one hour.

Drive.

Take drugs or alcohol.

After your time out, return and see if others are ready to talk. If not, be prepared to wait until things have cooled down.